Christmas is coming and social media is full of hundreds of craft activities, outings and reels of beautiful children dressing beautiful trees.  Settings have tough trays of Christmas themed activities and home corners have become Elf workshops.

But is this really what our children need?

Without wanting to sound like a Grinch, honestly I’m not sure.

It’s great to enter into the Christmas spirit and you probably wouldn’t be working in early years or play if you weren’t a fan of glitter and dressing up, but as we build our children’s cultural capital here are a few things to be aware of:

1. Are we suggesting that Father Christmas and the presents he brings are linked to behaviour?  It’s really easy to slip into the ‘be good or your won’t get presents’ mode, but since we all know it isn’t the ‘man in red’ who is providing the presents, we could be setting our children up for disappointment and a sense of failure. There will be children in your setting who won’t be getting presents this year (or maybe any other) because of financial concerns and that has nothing to do with the child’s behaviour.  Or maybe you have children whose families don’t celebrate Christmas so they won’t be getting presents either. 

It's also good to be wary about list writing (even though letters to Father Christmas can be a great writing activity) and particularly about promising that the letter will get to Father Christmas and the child will get those presents.  We’ve all heard of parents scrabbling around for a last minute must have after a surprise request at a late visit to Santa so let’s not add to the pressure by promising that he’ll bring what has been asked for.

Even families who do have the resource to give presents and are celebrating often do it differently. In my family Father Christmas only ever brought presents that went in the stocking, so small things, stationary, chocolate etc.  Some families have the main present from Father Christmas and some say everything under the tree has come on the sleigh.  Let’s not presume we know and be careful with what we imply is ‘correct’.

2.       Are we really being inclusive?  If you have children from different cultures and religions are you inadvertently making them feel ‘less’ because their own traditions aren’t celebrated in the way that Christmas is?  Did you have a tough tray out for one afternoon for Diwali or something short about Eid, then spend 3 or 4 weeks entirely engrossed in Christmas?  Or do you have children from different countries who have alternative stories about Father Christmas?  My children grew up in Eastern Europe with ‘Uncle Christmas and the snow queen’ and were very surprised to find Elves and Rudolph when we came back to the UK.  Several European countries have Sinterklauss which can be a great tradition to incorporate in our celebrations. Make sure you’re giving space for other stories and not presuming (or implying) that your way is ‘right’.

And what about our neurodivergent children?  Are we making sure that they’re able to keep ‘safe’ routines, quiet spaces and not be pushed into joining in things that are for parents benefit and not theirs?

We also need to be mindful of children whose family life isn’t what we might hope for.  The emphasis on Christmas as a family time can bring up all sorts of feelings for these children.  You may have children who are or have been in care, or children who live in homes where life is chaotic or they experience or see domestic violence.  For them Christmas may be a confusing or stressful time.  We can inadvertently add to this unless we’re mindful of what we are doing and saying.  

3.       Are we really being child led?  Some settings are amazing at this all year round, and then come December it’s all about the perfect Christmas card and product over process. We run a Christmas card competition every year and the entries that we put through to the public vote are the ones that look like they’ve had least adult input.  That’s meant we’ve had a Christmas lobster and a snowman squelch but it’s the child’s expression that’s important.   

We know that parents love a Christmas performance and for many it will be the first time seeing their child in this type of activity so there can be a lot of expectation.  Some settings use the Story Telling, Story Acting (Helicopter Stories) method as a more low key way of delivering a nativity.  If your children are used to this approach it can be really effective.  You can see an example of this here.

So hear us right! We’re absolutely not saying don’t celebrate Christmas in all it’s glittery wonder, and we’re absolutely not saying you’re doing things wrongly.  We’re just saying take a step back, make sure everyone is feeling included, that what you’re doing is for the children’s benefit and maybe take a little bit of pressure off yourselves and your families in the run up to Christmas.

Here are some links to resources that you might find helpful:

Descriptions of different traditions from countries around the world: https://www.teachearlyyears.com/learning-and-development/view/christmas-traditions 

Lesson plans and activities that you can use: https://www.educationworld.com/a_lesson/Christmas-Around-the-World-Lessons-and-Activities.shtml

Info on supporting children with additional needs and disabilities (also useful for sharing with parents):  https://parents.actionforchildren.org.uk/additional-needs-disabilities/support-home-school/send-christmas/

Domestic violence at Christmas:  https://www.ringroselaw.co.uk/2023/11/21/domestic-abuse-at-christmas-2/